I had painted my staircase late last year and decided to go with Benjamin Moore's 'Bavarian Forest'. But before I selected that color, I had bought a ton of samples that were just laying around the studio unused. Didn't want to waste them so thought to try them out on canvas - and what a fabulous way to put them to use in the end! The 'eggshell' finish brought out a wonderful varnished finish and since they're water-based, I could mix them very well with the rest of my acrylics. The consistency was fantastic too (just the way I like it) and SO pigmented. 

Now that I'm done raving about the actual paint, let's talk about how flustered I got with the actual painting. After creating two artworks that I was happy with, this third piece took a long time to settle down. And I'm going to blame all the frustration on the fact that I decided to start the piece with a moody green. 

The initial layer was absolutely fabulous. Most of the time I just want to say its finished right after the first layer. There's a certain 'raw and unfinished' element that is always my absolute favorite stage of a painting. The exposed canvas, the perfect blend between inky and textured gets me each time. But I know that there is far more to come so I keep on going. This time though was super rough. I knew what palette I wanted to go with but there were so many things I adored about the first layer that keeping them was so tough while still deciding on my final composition. I hesitated to layer, held back so many times to add anything and then ended up with something really ugly like this:

As you can see, it looks confused, muddy and plain messy. And not messy or chaotic by intention. It was painful to sit in front of it every day. That's when I had to tell myself to not be afraid of losing the elements that I was holding on to from the previous layer. Ended up softening the bottom area and actually covering the exposed canvas on the left side. And boom! Everything changed instantly. The added contrast, softer surface and pure white did a lot of fixing for me. So much so that it is my current favorite piece! Titled 'The Space Between Us' and here she is 

It's crazy that we're just a few days away from March already. And that it's 2019. I still can't get used to writing 2019 anywhere yet.  The month of January was super slow in terms of creativity. It's as if I couldn't focus in any one direction. In February, I started penning down some thoughts and ideas of where I wanted this year to go and the past couple of weeks have been the rocky start of my journey.

There's something so intimidating yet exciting about the beginning of each year. Even if we don't believe in resolutions, some of us subconsciously feel like it could be a new beginning of a new chapter. It is the start of a new year after all. I fall prey to it every time, and end up spending around 1-2 months planning out everything.  All that goes to s*@% by the time we hit Spring or Summer at the latest. This year wasn't any different. The only thing that I could give myself credit for is putting an end to it earlier than usual. Even if it was just be a couple of weeks. :) 

There was something that I read a few years ago that has lit a fire in my belly ever since. Here is how it goes: There was this ceramics instructor. He divided his class in half and instructed one half to create as many vessels as they possibly could until the end of semester. He instructed the other half to think and ponder over how they would create the absolute best vessel and then have it ready by the end of semester.
By the end of the semester, which half of the class do you feel ended up actually creating the absolute best vessel possible? I have tried to apply this to my work ever since. There are some artworks that end up being complete garbage which I then revisit when I'm ready and there are some that I feel take me to the next level. And that feeling of moving up in my own eyes is unbeatable.  

There are a few artworks I feel did that for me in the past few years. Milestones. Here's to all of them and excited to hit my next one. This year hopefully. 

For now, here's a piece I recently completed. It's moody and mauve.